Something I often talk about with my clients is our tendency to move the goal post (i.e.: expanding the scope of a writing project by making it longer, fancier or more complicated than it needs to be).

Sound familiar?

(I do it, too.)

We’re human, after all, and this is one the primary ways the inner critic shows up, by catapulting us into fear and overwhelm. Which is what happened to two of my clients this week.

M. and K. are both fabulous women, strong writers and successful business owners writing books on their topic of expertise. Intimidated by the vastness of the project before them, both started piling more to-dos on their writing plate. Once I helped them see how they were moving the goal post, we could get back on track and start moving forward, one manageable step at a time.

The Importance of Getting Support

This is where having support makes all the difference When you take a course, work with a teacher or hire a coach, you’re investing in solid, concrete support. Not only will that person help you stay accountable but they can also get you back on track by reconnecting to the bigger picture when you fall down the rabbit hole.

This is why finally hired a business coach last January (hi, Cindy!). Not only is she a fabulous human being and kick-ass coach with decades worth of real-life experience, but she keeps me on track. When I spin out, she reconnects me to the larger picture. She steers me away from rabbit holes and moves me out of that ever-growing list of shoulds.

Case in point: in my past couple of posts, I wrote about doing FB Lives. As you probably know, I’m passionate about memoir and helping others write their stories. So I got sucked into marketing shoulds because I really want to reach a lot of people. I think Memoir Mastery is an awesome course and I want to get it to as many people as I can.

But you know what? Turns out I don’t like doing FB Lives.

Me spouting off in front of the camera? Yuck. Me conversing with clients, giving them concrete ways to move forward? Yes.

One of the things I love most about my work is connecting to clients on Zoom, whether that’s for a 1-on-1 session or a group coaching call. I especially love the live writing calls and group coaching calls we do for Memoir Mastery, since that’s a wonderful way to learn from each other.

While hiking with a friend this weekend, I saw tons of dragonflies. My brief research taught me that they symbolism transformation and self-actualization, which I love. So I wanted to share this gorgeous dragonfly with you for inspiration. Photo by Varu Raghav on Unsplash.

So enough of the weirdly awkward FB Lives. It’s not me. And at the age 49, I’m so done with trying to be someone else.

(Anybody with me on that one? I thought so.)

That’s one of the things I love about getting older: the courage to let go of what other people think. The passion to clear away obstacles so that I can more fully step into my own skin.

Which usually means getting out of my own way, as well as getting support when I need it. And recognizing when my inner critic is running the show.

This is one of the ways I can be of support. I can help you see the larger patterns and help you shift them, just like Cindy does for me. There’s the beauty of working with someone who’s gone before, someone who can see those pitfalls when you can’t.

So tell me: what are you working on right now, and what kind of support are you needing?

Free, Live Training on Wed. Sept. 18

If you’re ready to get started on your memoir, I’ll be hosting a free, live training next Wednesday, September 18 called “3 Secrets to Successfully Write Your Memoir.”

Noon PT/ 1pm MT/ 2pm CT/ 3pm ET

Here’s what you’ll learn:

  • Everyone has a story worth telling. Here’s what will set you apart.
  • Overwhelm will keep you spinning in circles. I’ll show you the way out.
  • Self-care and mindset are essential when writing memoir. How and why harnessing the power of your inner critic is critical to writing personal stories.

I’ll also be telling you about my Memoir Mastery course, as well as sharing a new bonus I just added. And the call will be on Zoom (yay!)

Interested? Click here to register, as spaces are limited.

I hope to see you!



P.S.: As always, reach out with any questions. Simply email me at tanja [at] tanjapajevic [at] com. And have a fabulous week!


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